From Strong to Strength
We are strong! Strong people control their emotions, stay loyal no matter what, and serve others until exhausted. Strong is one of the hows I grew up with. Hows are expectations placed upon you by the family you grew up in. Some of the hows are positive and some of the hows are confining and even controlling. Strong became a source of pride for me. When I was strong, my parents were proud. When I was strong, I was admired. When I was strong, I was safe from people seeing deep
You Mean I Have a Choice?
When I began to tell my story in bits and pieces years ago, most people were empathetic and encouraging. There were a few who had one maddening question or comment in common and that was: How come you didn’t get help sooner? If you have been through trauma and abuse, you know this question. It comes in many forms, and all with the same underlying assumption—the assumption that you had a choice. The questions include, why didn’t you leave?, why did you go back?, why didn’t you
Who Should I Be?
As children, we look to the trusted adults in our lives to discern who it is we should be. This is a normal part of developing a healthy sense of self. The only challenge is we are watching beautifully complex and flawed human beings for our cues. This can lead to quite a bit of confusion in our journey! In a perfect world without pain and a desire to climb to the top, we would all develop a clear idea of who we are and that would be supported by all the adults in our lives w
The Beauty of Red Shoes
Beautiful is my essential nature. This means when I am my authentic self, I am bringing beauty into the world with what I speak, what I do, what I wear, and even what I think. It goes beyond being beautiful inside and out. It is almost like walking through the world with a paintbrush that turns everything a little brighter and a little more positive. There is only one problem with my essential nature: I am challenged in how to embrace beautiful. I want to embrace it. Who does